Civil Union or Marriage? The Differences in NZ
How a civil union differs from a marriage in New Zealand, what stays the same, how to change one into the other, and the licence and ceremony.
The short answer
In New Zealand, a civil union and a marriage are two separate legal relationships that work in very similar ways: both are open to any two people regardless of gender, both need a licence, a registered celebrant and two witnesses, and both end only through the Family Court. The real differences are the name, the words you say, how you apply, and how the relationship is treated overseas and in a few areas of law such as adoption.
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If you're in one and want the other, you can change over without ending your relationship first. Here's how it all works.
General guide only. This isn't legal advice. Fees, forms and timings change, so check the current details on govt.nz's Civil unions and Get a marriage licence pages, or with Births, Deaths and Marriages (BDM), part of Te Tari Taiwhenua, the Department of Internal Affairs. If anything about your situation is unusual, talk to a lawyer or your local Community Law Centre. Last checked: 22 October 2026.
Side by side
| Marriage | Civil union | |
|---|---|---|
| The law | Marriage Act 1955 | Civil Union Act 2004 |
| Who can enter one | Any two people, regardless of gender | Any two people, regardless of gender |
| What you call each other | Spouse, wife, husband | Civil union partner |
| Licence fee (govt.nz) | $158 | $158 |
| Applying | Online, or a paper form signed in front of a Registrar | Paper form signed in person in front of a Registrar |
| Who conducts it | A registered marriage celebrant | A registered celebrant who can conduct civil unions |
| Witnesses | Two | Two |
| Ceremony | Personalised or registry | Personalised or registry |
| Certificate | Marriage certificate | Civil union certificate |
| Recognised overseas | Widely | Not everywhere |
| Ending it | Dissolution order from the Family Court | Dissolution order from the Family Court |
What's the same
Who can have one. Same-sex marriage has been legal in New Zealand since 2013, so both options are open to every couple. govt.nz describes a civil union as the formalisation of a relationship between two people, regardless of gender.
The steps. Both need a licence from BDM before the ceremony, and it's one step in a longer list (our month-by-month planning checklist shows when). govt.nz says to arrange it at least 3 working days before the day, and that it expires 3 months after it's issued. Both need a registered celebrant and two witnesses, and the ceremony can only happen at a venue named on your licence, so add a back-up venue to the application if the weather might move you inside.
The ceremony itself. Both can be a personalised ceremony, anywhere you and your celebrant agree with your own vows, or a registry ceremony on a weekday with set wording. Neither can be held online: govt.nz says the couple, celebrant and witnesses must be physically together.
Afterwards. Your celebrant registers the relationship with BDM, and you order your certificate separately. The "copy of particulars" you sign on the day isn't the certificate. Changing your name works the same way for both, and you'll want the certificate for that.
The legal effect in everyday life. Community Law describes a civil union as "a legal relationship similar to marriage", and either one is ended the same way, by a dissolution order from the Family Court.
What's different
The name and the words. This is the difference most couples care about. A civil union lets you formalise your relationship without calling it a marriage. Some couples prefer that for personal, family or religious reasons, or simply because they like the idea. In a registry ceremony you use the standard civil union statement rather than the standard marriage vows; in a personalised ceremony you write your own.
How you apply. At the time of writing, govt.nz offers an online application for a marriage licence. For a civil union, it describes a paper form (the Notice of Intended Civil Union) that one of you takes in person to a Registrar of Marriages to sign. Community Law also says the civil union notice must be filed in person, not online. Allow for a trip to the registry office.
The celebrant. Community Law says a civil union must be conducted by an approved civil union celebrant (or an exempt body, which currently means only the Quakers). Not every celebrant does both, so when you're choosing one, ask them directly. DIA's celebrant search lets you check registration.
Overseas. govt.nz warns that some countries don't recognise New Zealand civil unions, and suggests getting independent legal advice before you enter one. Marriage is recognised far more widely. If either of you might live, work or inherit overseas, or holds another citizenship, this is the biggest practical reason couples pick marriage.
Adoption. Community Law notes that the Adoption Act lets "two spouses" apply jointly, which courts now read as including de facto couples, but says the law for civil union partners "is complex" and recommends independent legal advice. If you're planning to adopt together, get that advice before you choose.
Changing a civil union into a marriage (or the other way)
You don't have to dissolve one to enter the other. According to govt.nz's Change a civil union to a marriage page, the steps are:
- Fill in the form. Form BDM 59 changes a civil union to a marriage. Form BDM 359 changes a marriage to a civil union. Both are on the govt.nz page.
- Show your current relationship. You'll need evidence, such as your certificate or the copy of particulars from your first ceremony.
- Sign in person. One of you takes the form to a Registrar of Marriages, who witnesses the declaration, at least 3 working days before the new ceremony.
- Get a new licence and hold a new ceremony. The licence fee applies again, and your celebrant charges their own fee.
If you both live overseas, govt.nz says you can fill in the form without signing it, post it to the registry office nearest your ceremony, and then sign it in person with a Registrar at least 3 working days before the ceremony.
Two catches for relationships formed overseas. An overseas marriage can be changed to a civil union here. But a civil union from overseas can only be changed to a marriage here if it took place in the UK, Germany, Finland, Vermont or New Jersey. If yours was somewhere else, ask BDM what your options are.
Which one should you choose?
There's no wrong answer, but these questions usually settle it:
- Do either of you have ties overseas? Another passport, family property, plans to move: marriage is the safer choice.
- Are you planning to adopt? Get legal advice first.
- Does the word matter to you? If "marriage" doesn't sit right, a civil union gives you the same commitment under a different name.
- Have you found your celebrant? If you love them and they only do marriages, that might decide it.
You can also have both, in a sense: a civil union now and a change to a marriage later, with a second ceremony to mark it.
The paperwork, either way
Whichever you choose, the steps and the timing are much the same. Our guide to getting a marriage licence in New Zealand covers when to apply and the questions to ask BDM, and most of it applies to a civil union licence too.
Online Wedding Invitation's checklist counts back from your date and reminds you when to sort your licence, alongside your invitations, RSVPs and wedding website.
Quick questions
What is the difference between a civil union and a marriage in NZ?
Mostly the name and the words. Both are open to any two people and both need a licence, a registered celebrant and two witnesses. Community Law calls a civil union "a legal relationship similar to marriage", though adoption and overseas recognition can differ.
Is a New Zealand civil union recognised overseas?
Not everywhere. govt.nz warns some countries don't recognise them, so get legal advice if either of you might live, work or inherit overseas.
Can we change a civil union into a marriage?
Yes, without ending it first. Form BDM 59 changes a civil union to a marriage, and BDM 359 does the reverse.